Being impacted by layoffs is one of the hardest things you can experience in your career, but how you remember the event actually carries more weight over time than the experience of the event itself. That's because each time we remember something, we're not remembering the event itself, we're actually remembering the last memory we had of the event. What does that mean for you? You can actively shape your memory of hard career moments in a way that's to your advantage. Here's how:
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1. Do something out of the ordinary | When you look back at the time that you were impacted by a layoff, you can "tip the scales" of your memory by doing something out of the ordinary within a day or two of being let go. If you've always wanted to go sky diving, consider using your first day without work to check that box. You could also take yourself to that nice steakhouse you've been eyeing, or paint a wall in your house a bold color. Heck, you could even die your hair a bold color if that sounds exciting. The point here is to attach a unique, positive experience to the event of being let go. Over time, you'll start to recall the feel-good specifics of this second activity more than the details of losing your job.
   
2. Seperate the event from yourself | The first few days and weeks after being let go can feel awkward, especially as you start to tell friends and family your news. Be mindful of your language in these moments and choose your words carefully to reinforce that this isn't a reflection of you or your capabilities, it's simply something that happened to you. Here's what that might sound like: 
   "I was let go from my job. I'm bummed, but also know that these things are happening more and more. I'll be okay, and would love any ideas or support you've got!"
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3. Reinforce the positive memories | During the first few days after being let go, it's normal to feel angry, sad, or confused. As you begin to reflect and process, challenge yourself to think of one positive memory at the organization for every sad thought that comes to mind. Write down those positive memories, and reference them as you start your job search. These can inform what kind of organization you want to join next, and helps your memory hone in on the best parts of your experience rather than be clouded by the less-than-great moments.

Put simply, your memory is malleable. Knowing this helps you take control and proactively shape those memories in a way that serves you best. And lastly, if you're looking for help talking about hard moments in your career, join an upcoming Personal Career Story workshop for live support and guidance.